A documentary about Ukrainian defenders’ wives — waiting, loss, resilience, and love — capturing how war reshapes everyday life, relationships, and memory over four years of full-scale invasion.
How wives of defenders have spent four years waiting, volunteering, raising children, and coping with losses
Recently in Kyiv, a closed screening of the documentary film “She” by director Tetyana Stanyeva took place. Before its official premiere in Ukraine, it had already been shown in Bolhrad, Odesa region, as it tells the story of women who lived there at the beginning of the full-scale Russian-Ukrainian war, and of their husbands — marines from a military unit stationed in Ukrainian Bessarabia.
The film’s official world premiere this year, on February 25, took place in Sofia, the capital of Bulgaria, as it also tells the story of Ukrainian Bulgarians. The film, also described as a diary of the wives of Ukrainian Armed Forces servicemen, was also shown in Plovdyv.
In Kyiv, almost all the main protagonists came to the screening, highlighting the connection between life in the rear and the service of Ukrainian defenders resisting Russian aggression. Ukrinform watched the documentary “She” and spoke with the servicemen and their wives to learn more about the filming and the moments that remained behind the scenes.
FOCUS ON THE WOMEN OF UKRAINIAN DEFENDERS
Over the past four years, dozens of professionally made documentary films have been created about the full-scale Russian-Ukrainian war, including “20 Days in Mariupol” by Mstyslav Chernov (which won the Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature) and, by the same director, “2000 Meters to Andriivka”; “One Summer in Ukraine” by Volodymyr Tykhyi; “Porcelain War” by Brendan Bellomo and Slava Leontyev; the film series about artists “Culture vs War,” initiated by the association “Watch Ukrainian!”; “Da Vinci” by Volodymyr Sydko; “Andriy Zhovanyk. The World as Will and Representation” by Serhii Dariychuk; “Kuba & Alaska” by Yegor Troyanovskyi, among many others.
Among all of them, Tetyana Stanyeva’s film “She” stands out for its focus — shifting attention to the lives of the wives and relatives of Ukrainian defenders while their husbands spend years defending the country from enemy aggression. It is also an observational film following its characters over several years.
“For almost four years I observed this story. And it is a story about love: the love of wives for soldiers; soldiers for their families; and all of us — for our native land. A love that overcomes fear and motivates people to fight; that makes them wait and unites us all in supporting the army,” says the film’s director Tetyana Stanyeva, founder and organizer of the International Ethnographic Film Festival “OKO,” which was born in Ukrainian Bessarabia and strongly connects Ukraine and Bulgaria.
The documentary film “She” tells the story of life after February 24, 2022, of women of different ages: Olha Atanasova, Olena Lysak, and Nina Bykovska. They are united by the fact that they became partners of servicemen of the 88th Separate Marine Infantry Battalion of the Armed Forces of Ukraine. Together, they worry about the defenders, volunteer, and cope with psychological challenges and trauma.
In fact, the film contains several more storylines. Viewers sympathize with Gagauz woman Khrystyna Karagyez, who lost her husband in the war — Kostiantyn Karagyez, a native of Zaliznychne village in the Bolhrad district. The filmmakers also highlight the humanitarian initiative “Budjak Relief,” created in Ukraine in cooperation with Turkish partners engaged through the initiative of the “Union of Gagauz of Ukraine” to strengthen humanitarian support for the southern region.
“I am sincerely glad that my Bolhrad and our 88th Separate Marine Infantry Battalion are on screen and in the archive of our war. In the historical memory of our country there are feats, resistance, and struggle of my southern region,” the director notes, adding that the film was made with the support of the Ministry of Culture of Ukraine.
Each of more than one thousand five hundred days of full-scale resistance to Russian aggression, marked by the unprecedented heroism of Ukrainians of different ethnic groups and very painful losses, is also often filled, unfortunately, with misunderstandings between those who are constantly at the front and some people in the rear. Tetyana Stanyeva hopes that the film story “She” will help reduce the gap of alienation between military personnel and civilians.
The experiences of both are very different, yet everyone is living in the reality of war. The key is to understand and feel the state of those who are nearby or at a distance. Because behind the relative calm of the rear compared to the hot spots of the front, there can be hidden someone’s painful, abruptly interrupted pregnancy or nervous exhaustion that cannot be overcome without medical help and tranquilizers.
“HOW LONG WILL THIS LAST”: THE STORY OF OLENA AND DMYTRO
The frames of the documentary film “She” mostly depict civilian life. The moments were captured over the course of several years starting in the summer of 2022: first in Bolhrad, where the heroines were caught by the full-scale Russian-Ukrainian war, and later in Zhytomyr, where some of the film’s characters were later taken by fate.
The filmmakers’ request to film the servicemen of the 88th Separate Marine Infantry Battalion was not immediately granted. However, director Tetyana Stanyeva is determined and persistent in realizing her vision, and eventually permission was obtained. One day of filming on the Pokrovsk direction in the autumn of 2025 added unique footage of the defenders.
One of the stories in the film follows Olena Lysak, who is currently on maternity leave to care for her child. The couple’s younger son, whose first word was “dad,” is now over a year and a half old. Their older son is already in second grade, while at the beginning of the film viewers see him still at preschool age.
“We continue to support the guys as much as is possible now,” Olena comments. “My husband continues to serve, now holding the rank of major. We patiently wait and believe that everything will be fine: Dmytro will return, and we will enjoy spending time with our children together.”
She adds: “Every moment of the film that we watch is not just an ‘album of memories’ for me. I relive each past event again. What everyone saw in the film is about 7% of our real life, our pain and our joy.”
Olena is grateful that her husband was granted a several-week leave, allowing the family to spend time together. When Dmytro is on duty, they try to communicate as often as possible via video calls so that their sons can still see their father, even if only in this way.
“When our younger son was born, Dmytro came and immediately left,” Olena says. “Then he returned almost six months later… It is very difficult to accept such a long absence. Even when you seem to have finally gotten used to it, there comes a moment when thoughts start to overwhelm you: ‘How long will this last?’, ‘Why are we living like this?’”
Over these years, Olena went through a very difficult period when she lost a child at the beginning of the seventh month of pregnancy. “We were really waiting for a daughter. It was a painful loss,” says the serviceman’s wife.
In unison, Olena and her husband say: “Our battalion is our family. We usually celebrate holidays together with our children and wives.”
Olena and Dmytro attended the second screening of the documentary film “She” together: first in Bulgaria, then in Ukraine. Marine infantryman Dmytro Lysak (by nature he prefers to stay out of the frame) says the film allows him to see his younger son during a period he missed due to the war — he was unable to observe his baby’s development or take care of him personally.
NEW UNIFORM FOR THE GROOM-GRENADE LAUNCHER OPERATOR IN 2022 AND INTENSIVE TRAINING FOR MOBILIZED SOLDIERS
“A serviceman will see much more in this film than a civilian, because there are many very specific moments in it,” notes another character in the film, military psychologist Serhii Bykovskyi.
For example, in the film professional grenade launcher operator Kostiantyn Karagyez gets married in a brand-new uniform. In the first months of the full-scale Russian-Ukrainian war, it was almost impossible to find one. However, thanks to the efforts of the entire battalion, it was delivered to the groom. He was very happy.
Unfortunately, 29-year-old defender Kostiantyn Karagyez, a member of an air assault company who had undergone military training in Georgia, was killed during a combat engagement in Kherson region as a result of a mortar strike near the settlement of Davydiv Brid, close to the “Orel” position, on October 19, 2022. For him, Dmytro Lysak, and Serhii Bykovskyi, the full-scale war began in Vuhledar, Donetsk region.
Some viewers may not pay attention to a civilian car in the background of a frame in the film “She,” when the camera crew was working with the 88th Separate Marine Infantry Battalion. But for the military, it is immediately clear that the filming took place not on the front line, but on the second line of defense.
“Our guys don’t show their emotions. And it is very difficult to reach them,” says Serhii Bykovskyi. “They don’t have time for idle thoughts, because they are constantly busy: preparing equipment for deployment, refueling it, training in shooting exercises, both day and night drills. The soldiers simply collapse from exhaustion when they get 4–5 hours of sleep, if they are lucky.”
Mr. Serhii is a professional military officer who has served in the Armed Forces since 1988. He graduated from a military college and is a Class 3 military pilot. After the collapse of the Soviet Union, he submitted a resignation report but continued his service in the Armed Forces of Ukraine. He served 14 years in this specialty. Due to downsizing, he was discharged. For nearly seven years, he worked as a journalist. In 2018, he joined the Marine Corps as a contract serviceman.
The soldiers of the 88th Separate Marine Infantry Battalion held the Black Sea coastline for five months; they carried out combat missions on Zmiinyi Island, near Chongar, and in Krynky, among other hot spots. The battalion has an authorized strength of 500 personnel.
One moment that stays with every viewer of the documentary “She” is the military psychologist’s wisdom, which he shares with newly mobilized men about how to handle weapons and how to view the enemy that attacked their independent state. “I had no idea that this briefing of mine would end up in the film,” says Serhii Bykovskyi.
Among the men newly mobilized through the Territorial Recruitment Center, who joined the unit, he and other commanders had to quickly turn civilians into marines. The documentary “She” includes footage of their intensive training course, where they explain why one should not be afraid of the enemy. Not everyone can endure it; however, those who make it through to the end fight like lions.
DOCUMENTING LIFE DURING WAR IS NECESSARY EVERY DAY
Nina Bykovska is a primary school teacher by profession and currently works in a kindergarten. Having a husband in the military, she herself once served for eight and a half years and holds the rank of senior sergeant. “So I know military service in detail from the inside, which makes it even harder for me than for other girls,” she says.
The younger daughter of the Bykovskys, who graduated from the Institute of Journalism at Taras Shevchenko National University of Kyiv, made her first social media post calling for support for Ukrainian defenders already on February 25, 2022. “People came to us bringing food, medicine, and clothes. A little later, Olenka and Olechka joined the initiative. My Serhii went to the ATO back on January 17. But at that time, we still did not think about a full-scale war.”
Olha Atanasova, the wife of marine infantryman Oleksandr Atanasov, came to the closed screening in Kyiv with her son. Like all relatives of defenders, they dream above all of seeing their loved ones at home, living in peace.
Documenting events during war must be done every day, believes the director of the documentary film “She,” Tetyana Stanyeva. “We have already missed a lot, and I have no idea how to catch up. But we have to. Otherwise, we will have nothing to tell our children and the world,” she says. “We all thought victory would come soon and that the story would end quickly. But things did not turn out as we expected.”
From the start of filming in the summer of 2022 to its world premiere in February 2026, many changes have taken place in the lives of the film’s protagonists — the wives of Ukrainian defenders. Much has changed. One fulfilled her dream, without waiting for victory, by giving birth to a son with her beloved. Another went through relocation, panic attacks, and a change of profession. A third also experienced life changes, although her life may appear relatively stable from the outside. The city of Bolhrad now unites these women through shared memories, the location of the military unit where their husbands serve, and the film “She.”
Tags: documentary film EMPR.media human stories military families Ukraine culture ukraine war Ukrainian marines war stories women in war
